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"Women today are not giving us any cues that they want to be asked out, and without some indication or encouragement that he might be well received, a man is not going to risk the rejection -- which men are far more sensitive to than women evidently realize. The days of men asking women out are gone! Women don't even take the time to do little unspoken things, that interest a man. Something basic to our culture is being lost. No wonder so many women are so unhappy. In fact, many men have come to think women don't even like men, because of the way women react to their initial overtures. One of the rarest qualities to find in a young woman today -- at least towards eligible men -- was kindness. So many men are simply starving for kindness from a woman but so often find sarcasm and cynicism instead. One man commented to me on a climate nowadays of a prevailing hostility among women towards men. It is easy for a man to feel that some women are actually looking to find fault, ready to pounce on him at the slightest ill-chosen word or misspoken comment. In women this can manifest in self-righteousness, or a kind of assumed moral superiority over men -- often unconscious on their part. Men complain that they often feel around women that they cannot win, or say or do anything right. Such women drive men away. There are women, thanks perhaps to the effects of feminism, who act as though there were some sort of anathema against showing a man admiration, as if to say, "I'm not going to feed his stupid ego!" But, perhaps if his ego were fed once in a while he wouldn't be in the state of starvation that so diminishes a man as to prod him into the very ways that women find so intolerable. The result is a seemingly endless cycle of resentment and mutual punishment. Many women appear to have unwittingly made it a point of pride to take an unhealthy (if unconscious) pleasure in denying men what they most need by reacting to them with sarcasm, cynicism, laughs at the expense of men, and a general attitude derived from the world. Many of these cynical attitudes towards men become self-fulfilling prophecies so discouraging to a man that he may start to live down to the belittlement, just as he would live up to praise were it offered. Male ego only becomes a problem when it is undernourished. Properly fed, it spends less time rebelling and trying to feed itself in unattractive and self-defeating ways. Properly fed, it causes a man to strive to be the best that he can be for the woman he loves and the society he serves. One of the chief things under attack is the family, the home. And if family is under attack then it stands to reason that everything that leads up to family -- namely how men and women find each other -- is also under attack. Men are far more vulnerable to women than women can even imagine. Men are sensitive to things in women that women are not even aware of. The slightest bit of sarcasm from a women in whom he's interested can cause him to off the whole pursuit. A woman who thinks this weak on the man's part simply doesn't know how men are built and what men are feeling these days. We live in a culture that sinfully exploits women, but many women have retaliated by vengefully diminishing men with their tongues and attitudes. There is much healing needed on both sides. While not seeking a slavish dependence, a man needs to be needed by the woman he loves, yet the constant message sent (ad nasuem) by the modern woman is "I'm strong and independent! I don't need a man!" Of course, this is a hollow and defensive cry and betrays her bitter disappointment in men -- otherwise she wouldn't need to announce it so much -- but men hear it at face value and retreat. The old saying that men are only interested in "one thing" namely sex, is cynical and false. Men who become that way do so because they have given up on love and the hope that a woman would really receive him if he did open up to her." By- not a woman
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